betheball.wav
"I'm going to give you a little advice. There's a force in the universe that makes things happen. And all you have to do is get in touch with it, stop thinking, let things happen, and be the ball." - [Chevy Chase]
leanmean.wav
"You're lean and you're mean and you're not too far between, either, I bet, are ya, huh?" - [Bill Murray]
gopher.wav
"I want you to kill every gopher on the course...it's not my fault nobody can understand what you're saying."
gungagalunga.wav
"So I jump ship in Hong Kong, and I get on as a looper in the Himalayas...Gunga-Galunga..."
whenyoudie.wav
"...So we finish the eighteen, and he's gonna stiff me...when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consciousness. So I got that goin' for me, which is nice."
peach.wav
"That's a peach hon, oh golly I'm hot today."
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coke.wav
"Well I aint payin' no fifty cents for no Coke. Then you aint gettin' no Coke..."
tremendousslouch.wav
"You know, you should play with Dr. Beeper and myself. I mean, he's been club champion for three years running and I'm no slouch myself. -Don't sell yourself short, judge. You're a tremendous slouch." - [Ted Knight and Chevy Chase]
jewish.wav
"I think this place is restricted Wang, so don't tell 'em your Jewish, okay? Fine."
hat.wav
"Ah, this is the worst lookin' hat I ever saw! I bet you buy a hat like this you get a free bowl of soup, huh?...Oh it looks good on you, though."
slice.wav
"I bet you slice into the woods a hundred bucks. Gambling is illegal at Bushwood, sir, and I never slice. Damn! Okay you can owe me. I owe you nothing!"
iwant.wav
"I want a hamburger, no a cheeseburger. I want a hotdog. I want a milkshake. I want potato sala--You'll get nothing and like it!"
missputt.wav
"Hey Smails! A thousand bucks you miss that putt."
dogfood.wav
"Tell the cook this is low-grade dog food..this steak still has marks were the jockey was hittin' it."
sucks.wav
"Well this whole place sucks. sususus--That's right, it sucks."
baboon.wav
"He called me a baboon, thinks I'm his wife."
awfulplace.wav
"Is this your place Carl? Yeah, what do ya think? It's really awful."
idiot.wav
"People say, you know, that I'm an idiot or something, because all I do is cut lawns for a living. People don't say that about you, as far as you know."
schedule.wav
"I'm gonna be the head greenskeeper, hopefully within the next six years, that's my schedule."
thisisahybrid.wav
"This is a hybrid. This is a cross of Bluegrass--Kentucky Bluegrass, Featherbed Bench, and Northern California Sinsemilla. The amazing stuff about this is that you can play 36 holes on it in the afternoon, take it home and just get stoned to the bejeezus belt that night on this stuff." - [Bill Murray]
getlaid.wav
"Hey, everybody, we're all gonna get laid!" - [Rodney Dangerfield]
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